Woodbooger Griffith Takes Credit for Grants He Tried to Stop
The Mountain Bee — News So Exaggerated It Feels Honest
The Mount Rogers Planning District Commission — serving Bland, Carroll, Grayson, Smyth, Washington, and Wythe Counties, plus the Cities of Bristol and Galax — just scored $710,000 in federal grants for economic development and disaster recovery.
Enter Congressman Morgan “Woodbooger” Griffith, who popped up like a groundhog in a necktie to claim credit. He quickly put out a press release bragging about the funds and how they’ll “strengthen regional economies.”
Small problem: Woodbooger voted against the very bill that funded this money. That’s right. He tried to kill the cash cow, then showed up for the barbecue.
Here’s how the Woodbooger Shuffle works:
Step One: Vote no on the bill. Call it wasteful spending.
Step Two: Wait for the checks to clear.
Step Three: Grab the giant scissors, stand in front of a ribbon, and smile like you personally milked the Treasury.
The $210,000 planning grant and $500,000 recovery grant came straight out of the American Relief Act of 2024, which Griffith opposed as loudly as a rooster in a rainstorm. But now? He’s strutting around like he personally stitched the money into the district’s pockets.
It’s the political equivalent of stiffing the waitress, then bragging you left the tip.
So the next time you see Woodbooger grinning at a ribbon cutting in Bristol or Galax, remember: he did everything he could to block that ribbon from ever being cut. And now he’s just hoping the cameras don’t catch the ketchup stain of hypocrisy on his tie.